NAMA

The brainchild of the government who single handedly sold an entire 3 generations of a country into debt overnight, NAMA is the current Irish governments answer to questions that they don't yet know how to answer. Many would say that the Government strategy at NAMA's inception was to bore a hole straight through to the centre of the earth, where legend has it the King of all Crooks, a Mr. C.J. Haughey lives in palatial grandeur attended by his army of Coir handmaidens.

This strategy suffered from an array of problems synonymous with Irish government plans, lack of planning, accountability, actual figures, direction or timescales lead to the interesting development whereby the optimum strategy was to line the route to Chez Haughey in Tax payers kidneys. This long and protracted effort lead to the reinstignation of 'family values' at the heart f Irish politics, whereby those unable to breed successful future kidney donators were ostracized from public life. The old, the sick, the very young and other marginal groups were written out of Irish history as the government turned Ireland from a sovereign country into an 'Economy'. All things in the new Ireland revolved around the twin gods of 'tax payer' and 'competitiveness' in a race to the bottom.

Future plans for Ireland involve an auctioning off of lesser substates, such as Longford and Cavan, occupants of these boroughs will be available as serfs for the new landlords bidding, although work rates and comely-ness of maidens associated with these burroughs is debatable. The main hub of the 'Country formerly known as Ireland' and soon to be known as 'Diageopromotions.inc' looks less sure, as the NAMA black hole continues to demand fresh organs. The current monkeys who dance for these organ grinders, Messieurs Cowen et Lenihan make an affable double act shrieking and dancing in a desperate but yet unconvincing attempt to show the international community the logic behind the pursuit of the black hole prince.

Future plans for Ireland.inc involve creating an international talent show hub, where the best of light entertainment and mild animal abuse can be broadcasted worldwide hosted by a plethora of stars whose pay packets single them out as the best broadcasters in the world.

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